11.23 ChanneL

banana

2011-11-22T03:14:00.000-08:00

today i try to sign in this blog~ cool i still remember ur password...
and veiwing back before your written...
memory sick~

ya...i too miss you
i cant hide my feeling to you~

dont worry... you will never lost me..
im still here for you
when you needed me and i will be there for you~
coz love you let me dont no what happens going on..

tomorrow is our day ~ 11.23
are you still remember??
1st time we meet
1st time i saw u till i forgot how to breath
and smile until i don know how to close my mouth~
i miss this all...

i felt lucky
coz you still care of me.
thanks , nyu

he's smart , ofcoz he wont tell you
im smart too, so ofcoz i would like to let you know anything..

we all are selfish... it's because of love.
anywhere , i say is ture~
just want you to know, yesterday night i drunk~
so i bu xiao xin told you...
not mean like i want to hurt you..sorry
and i not means like want you to break up with him~
hope you will remember~

everything are changed.
so no need to explain too much~

I love you more than anything.

i will control myself to not bother you anymore~
take care.. bibi

Jas

2010-09-03T01:14:00.000-07:00

SoRRy.....
I Can't say anything.....
Hope you can remember....
miss u too much~

I love u more than anything

Missing u like crazy

2010-07-24T00:14:00.001-07:00

After so long I didn't post anything

finally today I can't help myself

but to talk about you

I miss you damn much

SO SO SO much

I dream and think of you every single day

I dreamt that we went 1 utama..haha

and want to buy cupcakes!

really hope that you will be by my side

SOrry I didn't keep my promise

But in my heart i still love you and miss you

our memory keeps lingering in my mind

I can't wait for you to come back

Love you like I always do

2010-04-17T06:02:00.000-07:00

"BIBI
I'm very sorry
I miss you very much
I Love you more than anything
I really want to come to your house

Please forvige me BIBI

WO VERY XIANG NI ar!!! :'( :'("
p/s: I didn't delete my blog, i private it

sad sad sad day

2010-04-17T05:54:00.000-07:00

It suppose that I can go to bibi house this evening
But......................
:(
I just don't know how to explain
I'm deeply deeply depresed now
how much I wish to see my bibi
I miss bibi so so muchie :( :( :(

I feel like crying out now
and I'm so damn tired
HAIYO
I"M GOING TO COME MY UNCLE PLACE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALOT of BAd News I got from HIM!!
HE CAN't even HELp but expect to know so much
DAMN IT!

HAng Out One Utama

2010-02-20T05:12:00.000-08:00

Oh gOODness

BBQ PLAZA AGAINNN!!!

This time

I'm eating with??????

SOOK ANN ANN

Haha.. lOok at her..

Love her outfit today, very trendy!!hehe

But, I have no idea why she said very "lala" wor??

We didn't order much today

and was me who decide to eat at BBQ Plaza again

I'm too addicted already++

Next,

We went "Yam Cha" at "LAVA"

\This is my CUCUMBER drink, transparent some more

Got abit of cucumber taste, gassy gassy and very sweet ~~hehe

Love it :) was recomended by the owner of the shop ^.^

Then we have the cinamon of... erm... erm..

Couldn't remember the name==

haha..

Not bad as well

Sook ann said is "cha kue" O.o?

Ta.Da!!

As for this

the funnel cake!!

It looks very delicious but

NOT as good as what we expected

The chocolate bitter bitter one..

no good no good~~

ANd is recomended by sook ann ann some more..

hahahahaha!!!!

But ice-cream very good very good :)

And of course..

We have

MISS LAI JO YEN here!!

I love her new look :D

Later oN,

We have

MISS WEI JING!!!!

SHe very leng lui want ar...

This HUGE CAT

was taken at new wing 1utama

This was given BY SOOK ANN ANN

Very sweet of of her : )

SHe gave me during lunch at BBQ plaza

Was really touched when I read this

I am blessed to have a GOOD FRIEND like you

Especially in Sri Aman

I thought i will never find a true friend there

But once you came...

Everything change :)

"YOu"

Shared Helped Listened Understand like no other true friend

Forever You Are

My BESTEST FRIEND!!

LAstly,

Got this candy for my darling, is kiwi flavour~~
hehe!!:)

The way It is..

2010-02-19T02:02:00.000-08:00

Was cooked by winnie teh and Lee chui YoNg

"BBQ PLaza"

hahaha
Actually big portion was cooked by me..

But is eaten BY NYu PrecilliA
Alone

We do ate a Lot..

ZoominG...

"this is what happens when you eat very long"

Kelian...
Left only the vege

All of us are too hungry..

After that...
Is dessert time..

hehe

Lycee and chocolate cheese

It looks good
But
It taste even Better ^.^

HAng out with winnie teh and lee chui yong yesterday
We spend real good time together
HAving out lunch at bbq plaza..
& love the sauce alot

After so long we didn't meet
and finally yesterday is the perfect day

Chuiyong when home earlier cause she's having her family gathering in the evening

Well,
which remains me and winnie shops around
we got some sandals at "STEP"
and had our ice snow later while chit chatting as well..

Anyway is great having them out
hope we could do this more..

The only One I'm thinking Is YOu

2010-02-17T06:41:00.000-08:00

"I really miss you so much now...
No call No message

You must be very mad

Words can't describe

How much I love you

But I really do..."

"An Quan Gan"

2010-02-16T08:01:00.000-08:00

Is every chinese people favourite's day
or
maybe we can say happy day?

But for me
Is just any ordinary day that i got extra holidays...
Cool??
I guess...
Lately,

I really don't feel like blogging

the mood is just not there...

However today,

my mood change..

Real bored now
And I miss someone real much:(
Feeling a bit sad
cause i think alot again

At times,
Is real difficult to express what I'm really feeling inside
I don't even have the guts to tell anyone else, not even her(jh)
Sometimes, i just want to be left alone, being single
but sometimes i wish being with someone...

Is so complicated...
I turn out to be more and more unreasonable (pa tau)
I don't know what's the exact thing i want from her
dong bu dong jiu angry till she is so afraid...
I feel very bad for her
that is why sometimes I just want to give up...

afraid of losing..
afraid she'll be taken...
afraid she'll not love me anymore..
I'm controlling, I know I am
she dislike the way I'm acting..

Problems and problems overlapping
I'm tired
I cried...

I know i'm gonna lose you one day cause the way i treat you
this is why i'm giving up more easily now
then regret..
I predicted the ending
for what we are feeling now when we are together
i fall faster and unable to grab tightly
cause i'm scare to be hurt.....................
that is why i told you
I don't have an quan gan when i'm with you

Back to the originaL

2010-02-08T07:51:00.000-08:00

Each time I leave,

I couldn't stop myself from turning back,

to have myself to give the last look on you,

P/s: sorry for pushing you awaY, I don't mean to..
it breaks me when i did...

To Someone Who Owns My Best Pal's Heart !

2010-01-19T23:02:00.000-08:00

I'm telling u this is for your own good. I never meant to scold u or to give u another pressure.
I'm here again is to help u. To be your friend !
I once told u this and i'm going to tell u again,

"If u dont change,u will lose her ! "

Is that what u really want from her?
To leave u and not to love u anymore?
If u dont change,u will not lose only her but also everyone around u ..

Why cant u realised how much that she had done for u?
Why cant u see that everything she's doing is just for u but no one else?
Why cant u realised she is the One that is helping u out?
Why cant u see that u're the only One she loves not ******* ?

She wants u to change is not for her but for the best of U !!

U remember the promises u made to her?
U remember all the things u said and swore to do it?
What happened to all that now?
Why stopped now? Why disappoint her now?

Why cant u just appreciate her and love her like she do to u?

When its too late,u cant never turn back time anymore !!
Please dont be like me ..
I wish to hold her back in my arms but i will never have the chance again ..
Do u know how painful it is to lose someone u really love?
U will never know until u lost her.
Its just too late to say "I'm sorry .." anymore ..

U still has a chance,a chance to turn everything back. A chance to mend things back to where it was from the start. Why wish to ruin it and not appreciate all u had?

All the tears she shed for u,all the love she shared with u. And all the things she done for u is all because she loves u. No one else ! Damn it !

Where are u? The first impression u gave me when i first knew u. The feelings and thoughts that i knew my best friend will be secure and safe in your hands.
Where is the one i knew will stood up and defend for my best friend whenever she has problem ?
Where is the one i knew that swore to protect her and told me she is your only one u will love and care always ?
Where is the one i knew that used to bring smile to her ?
Where the hell are u ?!

Is this how u're treating my best pal now ?

I knew that u will hurt her so in this way,i wouldnt had let her to be with u from the first place !

Wake up !

U both still loves each other !

Dont lose each other for a silly mistake that can be change.

U're not useless at all ! U just gotta stand up to give the best of yourself !

Please dont disappoint me ..

Ending of all

2010-01-19T22:04:00.001-08:00

Is part of learning

I did my best to appreciate everything

But all I have is a piece of nothing

Disappointment and disappointment keep coming in

It never stops lingering in my life

I'm tired

I never knew it would be this fast but it did

For now, i just want to concentrate in my studies

that's all

hope and despair~~

2010-01-16T22:57:00.000-08:00

You mean so much to me

I tried my best effort to make you change

No matter how mad I am to you

My feeling for you will never change

Never!

......

I'm guilty heartbreaking after each time I treat you this way

what's more?

my heart is really tearing to see you like that

That is why,

I held you back and can't let go each time too

is because my feeling for you is still so strong

never a moment it is taken away from me

......

Stand up and tell me that you can do it instead of just trying

Believe in yourself

I am here for you now

I'm supporting you

....

But I can't never succeed by doing it alone if you don't corporate

It takes two hands to clap

Mine is ready

but where is yours?

......

I'm getting tired here

Maybe I just don't feel safe sometimes

Maybe I put such high hope on you

But you are just letting me down

......

You are not useless!!!!

You are just keep thinking that you ARE

You are easily manipulate from the one you love the most

......

Please....

Please stand up for yourself for your family and for me..

I will be here for you

You have to change!!

Or else I'm very very sure one day you will definitely lose it all

......

Lastly..

I just want you to know

that my feeling for you will never change

it is always here

......

But if you never ever appreciate and continue being like that

This feeling,

I promise it will eventually fade one day

......... ends...........

Sleepless night

2010-01-04T16:44:00.000-08:00

I'm real tired yesterday

real tired actually

still I can't fall asleep.........

A lot of things are going around my mind

The feeling came by when I couldn't sleep yesterday night

for the whole night actually...

This feeling was like how I used to get hurt before and trying hard to let go

I'm scare this feeling will come back and hunt me again

I don't want to loss you too

I really don't want

BUT after you told me last night

That your sis never wanted you to see me again

and also the taiwan things................................................

Is possible we won't be together

though I cried for wishing not to but can anyone hear me?

I felt bad for what i have told you yesterday night as well

I shouldn't have said to you like that

Finally,

I have no idea why u kept mentioning about your 2nd ex-gf

I wonder if you are on the phone with her yesterday night

something that you can't tell me

something that you are hiding from me

I'm tired of guessing

I will wait you for telling me yourself......

Gratitude to YOU

2009-12-21T07:17:00.000-08:00

Is amazing to have YOU as good my friend

Whatever life throws our way, we can remember that we have each other

Remember this whenever you are low i'm here for you
to be your listener :)

And
I'm thankful too...
to have you as my best friend
thank you for everything
LOve and hugs :)

ll Thanks to a lovely Dear =) ll

2009-12-21T03:26:00.000-08:00

To a wonderful pal of mine,Precillia .. =)

" Without u,it is impossible i could stay this strong till today. Without u,i wont be here today. Without u,i wont get to see the world in a better way. Without u,my life aint a complete one. From the first day u stepped into my world,i never regret having u as a great friend of mine. Sorry to say this but i'm aint letting u go no matter what comes in my life. Will always hold u close to me and never will i let go =) Thanks for always being by my side,your presence in my life makes my life a whole new world to be live in. Thanks for all your care and love to me. Hugs dear dear ! "

My wish for you,

2009-12-16T09:47:00.000-08:00

I wish

YOu will be alright, he'll be alright, your whole family will be alright

I wish

YOu can stay strong, he'll stay strong, your whole family will stay strong together

I wish

YOu will not think too much but to hold on, your whole family too

The only thing is

support him

be there for him

pray for him

to my dearest bestfriend and family

gloomy~

2009-12-15T02:16:00.000-08:00

I feel real bad today

MY dear best friend is having problem

and I can't even help

I don't know what to reply her

I don't know what to say

AND

I'm having bad dreams during my nap time

I dreamt of my mum again

which makes me feel worst
cause...................

haiz

I'm going out tonight

guess who?

Ying Chiet..

I'm going to find out what is worng with her..

AND solve the problem as soon as possible

Missing you so much.....

2009-12-10T04:48:00.000-08:00

I miss you so so so muchhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Feeling weird when i don't get to hear your voice for some time...

Hmm...

Do you miss me as well? :(

HAhaha...

Just when i write this

i get your phone call,

telling me you'll be coming tomorrow :) :) :)

ChocolaTeSS Love

2009-12-09T23:22:00.000-08:00

StoRy :

I remember u came to my house feeling sad looking at me like that on the bed...

Telling me how worried you are

YOu are unsure whether i'm angry or in pain

I didn't say a thinG

aFter i realise for what you have done

I'm reaLLy touched(gan dong)

I never thought u could just leave your job and came to see me

I was shocked but I really want you to be close to me

I'm sorry for acting childish and unreasonable

I'm sorry for all my jealousy and selfishness

I'm sorry for thinking too much

I'm sorry when I compare you and "her"

U mean too much to me too

I'm scare of losing you......

Give me some time to have the faith in You

I need you to PROVE to me as well

But.....

I will try not to repeat my mistake

I will always treasure for all that you have done:) :) :)

haha, anyway

I finish all the chocolates alreaDy``hehe

I love you my darling~~~

everyOne whO??

2009-12-09T22:12:00.000-08:00

Christmas tree????WHo and WHo agAIn?? hahaha

OMG!!!!!!!!!

WOW.. twO lenG zaI!!!

Fairly tale LOve's

2009-12-02T02:54:00.000-08:00

I almost forgot to throw away that rotten orange..

suddenly it appears in my mind yesterDay

IS time

and with no regret for me do it this time

I'm moving on great in this moment of time

Everything have change

Everything.....

I'm happier than before

I'm luckier than before

IS a better me than before

CAuse a handsome prince has brought a charming white horse

and he bring me to his own world

A world that i dream so much for it to happen

A wonderful love story

is like a true fairly tale now

I never want to let go

I never want to lose again

I know is going to be tough to walk through this journey

BUt with all the heart

with all the power of love

with all the strength that holds

Is strong enough for this journey to be forever

I gain so much

I know we both do

We learn...

We stay strong...

We hold on....

We care...

We stay away from insecure situation....

We improve to be better....

We trust...

We believe...

We grab each opportunity....

We plan the future....

Our Bond will kept us going further than we ever expected

cause this beautiful fairly tale story will be our everlasting journey

drop down

2009-11-28T05:39:00.000-08:00

misunderstAnding is the word to describe all
But Jokes is the word that i can't take it now
action makes the difference
but you are not doing it
instead of keeping quiet
which make things worst

Portray my heart

2009-11-23T20:29:00.000-08:00

I do not feel safe

When the sanity captures my dream

I can't recognize the meaNing behind

I'm scare of losing

I can't afford to lose anymore

Cause my heart had already started to be given away

Is a risk?

Is a gamble?

I did thought of that before

Cause it Once happened

BUt...

NO matter what it is

I will JUst do what my heart tells

Believing you

Have faith in you

Giving you all that I have

and perhaps one day it will be me and you eternally~

I'll wait for you I promise you...I will

2009-11-22T07:44:00.000-08:00

In My heart is now filled with one word that i can't describe

Is this reaL?

Will it be?

I don't know....

But this word definitely mend back my heart

I want more

Can she give it to Me?

I want to trust her

I want to believe her

I want to know beyond than that

I want to know much much more

and most of all, have faith within her heart

She's real now

She is....

afraid..

scare..

worry..

will not overpower my mind

If she do it right

The "5" SOmEs in AEoN BuKiT TinGGi~

2009-11-20T19:01:00.000-08:00

Ok..

Is another outinGzzz with my 4 gooD frienDs

WHere???

hehehe...

AeOn Bukit tiNggI of cOurse.. My klaNg Big maLL!!

FirsT part :

we reach there 11AM MORNING!!!

Go have our erm... i'm not sure is a lunch or breakfast at DraGon-i

hahaha... swt swt me ++"

we order quite alot

IN the end we didn't manage to finish our food...haiz

erm.. but anyway

Let me introduce my friends here

This oNe here drinking

is caLLed JAckiE chan

hahahhahaha XD

joking Joking

SHe don't like people call her that

is jack jiahui the planner of the daY..hahaha

so her picture must be the 1st one

This two lenG LUi here are miss chiNN YI and Miss Ai LinG
cooL pose man!!! hahaha

Both of them are good in taking picture

OK this is quite a lame picture..

IS ME anD My dearest gooD fRIeNd Miss lee CHUi YONG

she is a very funny person as well

wait till you see the picture down there then you would know why i said she is funny

hahahaXD

Haha... the sweet sweet picture of jiahui and chinyi

AWARD TO:
The BEST picture Of ALL

CHINN YI YOU are SOOOOOO pretty

AWARD TO :
The FUNNIEST picture of ALL

hahahaha XD

look at Lee CHui YOng,

she keep doing all those funny funny face

I laugh till I "beh tahan" also

SO beware to sit next to her!!!hahahaXD

hahaha...

is ME and My chuiyong

now she is normal

hahahaha XDXDXD

2nd PArt :

At LAvenDer YAm yaM cha there!!

erm, actually this should be the 3rd part cause we watch movie only then go yam cha wan

but nvm la..hahahaa

This is ailing playing with her ice- Lemon tea..hehe.. i guess is ice lemon tea

CHuI yONG..hahahaha

NOw you know why i say she very funny????

XDXDXD

Fuiyo ailing what's with that pose!!!!???

Awwwww...

sweeeeeeeeeeeet!!!!!! ;)

ok.. erm...

what am i doing???

not gonna tell

blek ;p

hahahaha

the Toilet PIcture of this 5 sOmes...

everyone is looking at the right part except me

I always the cacat onE

adui.. swt me!!

3rd PArt :

tadaaaaa.....

we are at the cinema WAtching ChristmAs carOL

Quite frightening at 1st

but lateR the story line got better

ANyway..

I enjoY my day hanging out with YOu guyS

I'm sure everyOne did as weLL

and thanks to everyoNe esp JIahuI she's the planner

calling each and every one of us

ANd reached aeon i think almost half and hour earlier to buy the ticket for us

hahaha.. thank you so much jiahui

WILL always miss YOU GUys

the END

:) :) :)

tHe ShOw~~ LifE iS a mAZe aNd loV3 is A riDdLe

2009-11-19T07:24:00.000-08:00

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

Slow it down
Make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
'Cause it's too much
Yeah, it's a lot
To be something I'm not

I'm a fool
Out of love
'Cause I just can't get enough

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

The sun is hot
In the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the sign
And synchronize in time
It's a joke
Nobody knows
They've got a ticket to that show
Yeah

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

Just enjoy the show

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

dum de dum
dudum de dum

Just enjoy the show

dum de dum
dudum de dum

Just enjoy the show
I want my money back
I want my money back
I want my money back
Just enjoy the show

I want my money back
I want my money back
I want my money back
Just enjoy the show
:) :) :)

LUcKy to bE in LOv3 wiTh mY beSt FriEnd

2009-11-19T07:08:00.000-08:00

Do you hear me?
Talking to you
Across the water
Across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky
Oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

Lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ohhhohhhohhhohhohhohhhohh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you, I promise you.. I will.. (I love this sentence :))

Lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

Though the breezes through the trees
Move so pretty, you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning round
You hold me right here right now

Lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday
Ohhhohhhohhhohhohhohhhohh
Ohhhohhhohhhohhohhohhhohhohhohhohh
:) :) :)

Last MInute>>>

2009-11-19T06:29:00.000-08:00

Last minute jiahui call And ask me out
to JUSCO Bukit tinggi tOmoRO MORNING!!!

Saying that chuiyong won't go if I don't go
what the???!!!!!!
hahahaXD

I don't feel like going actually
no mood to go
adui....
But I don't want to dissapoint her and also my friends
anyway, i comfirm going Ad

hmm...
thinking what to wear for toMoro's outinG..
swt swt ++"
haha..

HAPpY me to KNow Her!!!! :) :) :)

2009-11-18T22:23:00.000-08:00

I got to know someone yesterDay night

she is a very funny and friendly person

I can't believe that I have a chance to talk to her on the PHONE

I'M SO HAPPY to know her!!! :) :) :)

about her :

She is a left-handed just like me.haha

She amazingly cool with her look but her personality capture the whole picture of this remakable person even better

she knows how to play guitar aNd best part is she learn it herself!! extremely cool!!XD

sheloves snooker cooking swimming and erm.. lots lots more

loves singing as well..haha

haha

WELL

WHO IS SHE?????

JAS CHIN

WRiTTeN BY BEN~ You think you know what is LOVE??

2009-11-18T01:30:00.000-08:00

Don't find love, let love find you

That's why it's called falling in love because you don't force yourself to fall,

you just fall

Once you accept someone for who and what they really are,

they will surprise you by being better than you ever expected

LOVE is loving OR accepting a person with all his OR her strength and weaknesses

Lucky is the man who is the first love of a woman but luckier is the woman who is the last love of a man

When two friends fall in love they learn they are meant for each other

When they fall out of love they realize they want to keep each other forever

Find time to realize that there is one person who mean so much to you,

for you might wake up one morning losing that person who you thought meant nothing to you

Love is seeing yourself through someone's eyes and finding yourself in somebody's heart

Once you have loved, you will always love

For what's in your mind may escape but what's in your heart will remain forever

A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end

It keeps us together like your circle of friends

But the treasure inside, for you to see,

is the treasure of friendship you've given to me

Letting go has never been easy and holding on can be as difficult

Yet strengths measured not by holding on but by letting go

True LOVE doesn't have a happy ending,

that's because true love doesn't have an ending

Men vs. women: Men would rather sacrifice love to conquer the world

Women would rather give up the world just to be with someone worth the sacrifice

Decision should not be the choice of your heart or mind but sensible balancing of both

Some thoughts are better left unsaid,

some feelings are better left kept to yourself,

but love has it's way of expressing itself despite the silence

The happier the memory, the deeper it hurts (I love this sentence)

There are so many stars in the sky only some are radiant enough to be noticed Among those

you choose to ignore is the one which was willing to shine for you forever

even if your glance remained elsewhere

It breaks your heart to see the one you love is happy with someone else...

but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you

I love this post a lot..

thanks to ben he knows it all..

ChanGes bY nO meAns

2009-11-16T06:06:00.000-08:00

Miserable...

Horrible...

Terrible...

I feel like changing again

CHAnge and change

izzit really work??

SHould I change my blog design again?

SHould I change my phone number?

SHould I change how I really look?

SHould I change the sonG?

I thiNk the CORE changes is myself

The one undErneath

The one that has the greatest controL of Myself

Teressa is right,

"the person who loves you, won't be hurting you till like this"

I like this sentence

I love it a lot....

ANgrY!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-11-13T06:46:00.000-08:00

ArgH!!!!!!

I'm real mad!!!

plus so upset

My dad really annoyed me alot alot alot

I'm so so so mad

I feel like strangling someOne nOw............

ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stupid stupid stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm going to my uncle place TOMORROW

Don't want to see his facE.........................................................

uMmm.....

I feeL like talkinG tO someOne nOw

express how I really feeL Inside :( :( :(

hA. hA. hA

2009-11-10T08:30:00.000-08:00

Is a New sTart

Who ever I aM?

What ever I aM?

or sOO sOO evEr I aM?

I'm So gonna chaNge

Let everytHing be New

Let everytHing start over agaiN

This means that

I'm NOt gonna look back at the old stuFF

Is gonna be A fresh fresh fresh beginning
Like freshie Juicessssss..

One great thiNg about todaY

I didn't think about anyonE

Cause is the other siDe i'm going too see

PerceiviNg a new feeliNg

Well in this case

I'm getting A nEw soNg of course
I'm getting A nEw colouR
A nEw TheME
A nEw Way of style
A nEw Look
A nEw ME
DO I nEEd to get A new BEst freiND

unDer cOnsideratiOn

hahahahaaXD

dreAms that Haunt

2009-11-08T20:46:00.000-08:00

I woke up this afternoon
I don't feel nice at all
I was awake by my dream

I can't say it was a bad dream
I can't say it was a pleasant dream as well

Anyway, I dream of two person that I unconsciously misses them so much
The 1st one.... is my mum
The 2nd one.... is you

ABout my mum
my mum is acting weird again
I was angry with her at 1st but when she was with me i feel safe cause she was there for me when i needed her the most
As if... I have a mother that can help me to solve my girlish matter

sigh..i dunno how to put it in words
My heart is breaking for the way that I have treat her in my dream the same as I used to treat her in reality
I'm really a terrible daughter.. the worst one. I don't deserve your love, mum
That is why you should leave...

ABout you
YOu are being nice to me
You were sitting right next to me in a class
I'm really happy, you even accompany me to the washroom with a fren of yours(in my dream)
I can see you are getting fatter and you actually give me a warm smile
Eventhough you are acting pretty cool to me
YOu shouldn't come too, cause i feel as if you are giving me hope for another time

In the end, my dream wasn't that pleasant anymore
I was trapped in this huge washroom and it started to get dark in there
no one is in the washroom accept me and you are outside waiting for me
I tried each doorknob hopefully I might get out from this washroom
and what's frighten me the most is that I saw one of the chamber in the washroom suddenly has blood bleeding on the floor...
I'm so scare, i can feel my heart pumping real fast but fortunately i woke up from my dream...

IS this called haunted dreams??
It is so real to me.. so so real
It can really haunt me sometimes till my tears can actually be felt
It frighten me till I can feel my heart is beating so fast

Stop frightening me like that...
Stop all this....
I just want a goodnight sleep...
I don't want the dreams
good or bad, I don't want it either
JUSt leave me alone.......
PLease...... :'( :'( :'(

A NOTE FOR YOU

2009-11-07T10:45:00.000-08:00

there is a reason why i'm doing this
there is a reason for all my action
depending whether i want to let it be known or not
But i'm sure i'm very straight forward type of person (sometimeS)

I know I started to miss you again
I know I started to have those feelings again
I'm scare
I know if I confessed it to you
YOu will definitely say something hurtful
I need you to do that
I need you to hurt me once more
so I won't dare to miss you again
so those feeling won't come back
I want to move on

To be honest from the beginning itself
I'm very sensitive by every words that you typed
each and every one of your words count and is really important to me
I can just online for nothing just to wait for your reply
one word from you can make me cry non-stop...

Then, I remembered last week I told jiahui (thru chatting msn)
"I don't want to be like you, jiahui (she is waiting for someone, holding on)
I'm not like you
I'm scare of the pain
I just want to let go
I just want to forget
I don't want to be hurt again"

And jiahui replied
"You're hurt by her words and actions
not her herself"
She is right

I just need to push myself
I need to be tough
I know exactly what I deeply feel inside
But i'm not brave enough to admit

Don't worry about anything
I feel lighter after you said you're sorry
It means alot to me
It really do....
I'm sorry for using you

Is true that i still like you
But I will do my best effort to erase this feeling

I lie to you that I love the memories
I don't love the memories! The fact is these memories can't stop lingering inside of me
I regret of having it as well..
I blame my dad why keep forcing me to go ns at the 1st place
but i never regret of knowing you
you make me realize who I love better
something about you attracts me alot
I really can't describe

BUt Please
Please Believe me
I will letgo but forgetting you is something that i can't do
I will stop loving you, though you keep saying that you only like me instead of loving me and we never started before
BUT FOR ME.. it already did..
for me is more than just a good fren r/s when i was still close with you..
I know is not for you.. but the truth is... this is how i really feel inside
After all this I can't just like you
I know is more than that
is already the 11th month
and my feeling for you is still so strong
it couldn't be just liking you

YOu said time heals
then give me some time ok?
let the time prove it all....
and I don't usually promise someone
but this time I PROMISE i will let go of you one day

ends~

Another OutinG with?????

2009-11-05T05:36:00.000-08:00

Yes!!!

I'M out again

at subang parade with...

??????

haha

is a her.. try to guess 1st :p

Anyway,

went to eat manhattan fisH maRket with hEr

she recomended alot

and she knows all the good food

is great cause both of us can eat like anything
haha

I mean most of it lar...

we chat non-stop when we were eating

till the girl sit next to me have to switch place

I must have talked to loud

"pai seh" "pai seh"!!

hahahaXD

she is cutting it for me.. and herself too
hehe [0+0]

TA DAAAAA!!!!!!!
Is

LIM JIA HUI AGAINNNNN.... swt swt ++"

anyway I love the garlic butter sauce alot

she taught me how to eat with the rice and all

"tell you what, you are not only cool with the look but also super cool with all the good food man!!XD"

hmmm....
train delay again

memang swt la ++"""

actually today,

i came here to teman her to get her csl phone (with TV inside)

and finally she did

aiks!!!!

siapa ni??

haha

suppose to take both of our picture with her new csl phone

but end up macam ini, swt==

still dunno how to function it yet

Dui..

still fixing with the phone

she is still learning how to use it right

And this is the phone

at 1st I don't encourage her to buy

but after she bought it

quite not bad also the phone

haha

yup yup.....

at last picture taken with my phone

the best way ever

lol!!this picture is the funniest

look at her face "the constipation look"

hahahahahaXD
I ask her to post a sick look

end up

she post like tht ++

sooooo cute!!

she wants to delete the pic but i don't allow her to do so

I hope you don't mind i post this picture O.o :p

I think this picture is the best

thumbs up for both of us

chunted!!!hehe
though i look very lala

haha

love my finger nails????

I bought two different colours of nail polish today

& jiahui is the tester!! XD

I bought this clothes there too

finally,

thanks for belanja me today thanks for everything

love the meal alot

100 times better than the japanese one..haha

and sorryyy!! can't go aeon with you tomorrow

I know u have already plan everything but end up i need to put aeroplane

sorry lor..

argue with my dad just now in the car

so i plan not to go out tomorrow

but anyway

once again thank you so much for today!!! I really enjoy

hope you have a wonderful day as well

don't sad sad arr !!! smile smile ok??

How much i wish "she"(YOU) could Know this

2009-11-04T08:40:00.000-08:00

She can't see the way your eyes
will light up when you smile
She never noticed how you stop and stare
whenever she walks by
And you can't see me wanting you
the way you want her
But you are everything to me

(chorus)
And I just want to show you,
she don't even know you
She's never gonna love you
like I want to
And you just see right through me
but if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful miracle, unbelievable
Instead of just invisible, yeah

There's a fire inside of you
that can't help but shine through
But she's never gonna see the light,
no matter what you do
And all I think about is how to make you think of me
And everything that we could be

And I just want show you,
she don't even know you
She's never gonna love you like I want to
And you just see right through me
but if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful miracle, unbelievable
Instead of just invisible

Like shadows in the faded light, oh,
we're invisible
I just wanna open your eyes
and make you realize
And I just want to show you,
she don't even know you
Baby, let me love you,
let me want you
You just see right through me
but if you only knew me
We could be a beautiful, miracle, unbelievable
Instead of just invisible, oh, yeah

She can't see the way your eyes will light up when you smile

Dark Rains

2009-11-04T04:24:00.000-08:00

rain rain rain...
Please don't GO
Please don't STOP
Cause I want you to stay oN
keep the rain drops falling

I like the feeling
I like it a lot when the weather is dark
I like it better when it rains heavier
I don't know why
MAybe raining can portray better how I really feel inside

ANd when the thunder accompany the rains
It reminds me of something that
someone is afraid of you mr.Thunder
someone that are really afraid of you

"so when you come,
please don't make it so obvious"!!
You are frightening her :(

I'm not sure how this happen
But
it happens again

.........

I don't know how to describe my feelings with words
I'm scare
this falling rain describe everything
Perhaps or perhaps not~~
Dui
I'm really blogging rubbish here....

For ANother You I Wish

2009-11-03T07:52:00.000-08:00

Everything will be okay

Everything will be fine

Everything will be alright

DOn't think so MUCH

DOn't think so FAR

U haven't know anything yet

Is just an assumption

Is not COMFIRM either!!!

It doesn't prove anything at all

In everyone's life there is obstacles

is just a part of all humans life

Look at me!! and YOu know how much i have been through

And I'm sure these obtacles will soon go away

YOU go through a lot too

In the end

everything will turn out to be okay

Pray tonight

blog your feeling

Keep your head up and look at the bright side

Think of her and place it in your heart like you always do

and will always be

even though she is not here with you but in your heart she will forever be :)

I wish everything will be alright

and most of all

I will always be here for you too

LOts of hug and do take care my dear friend

someone send it to me..

2009-11-01T09:45:00.000-08:00

People come into your life for

a reason, a season or a lifetime

When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person..

When someone is in your life for a REASON,

it is usually to meet a need you have expressed

They have come to assist you through a difficulty,

to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.

They may seem like a godsend and they are

They are there for the reason you need them to be

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,

this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end Sometimes they die

Sometimes they walk away

Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand

What we must realize is that our need has been met,

our desire fulfilled, their work is done

The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,

because your turn has come to share,

grow or learn

They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh

They may teach you something you have never done

They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy

Believe it, it is real

But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons,

things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation

Your job is to accept the lesson,

love the person

put what you have learned to use in all other relationships

and areas of your life

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant

Thank you for being a part of my life,

whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime

KindergardeN graduAtion

2009-10-31T06:46:00.000-07:00

Today..

is my cousin "graduation day" from the age of 5 going to 6

and the graduation was held in my college

yaH..IN HICT KLANG!! they rent the place

so lame man!!!

hahaha..

Since....

i got nothing to do

so I mar go lor...

the kids dances were so cute which reminds me of my kindergarden days

but my day in the kindergarden is bad

I always got bullied by my friends

I don't really have any friends too

and i'm the tallest of them all

haiz..

i'm very very stupid always got played and teased by my friends

and i remembered when i complained it to my teacher

she wouldn't bothered much as well

because she don't like me and she thinks that i'm really annoying and always didn't do well in the class..

sad rite?? :(

Anyway, that's a long time story

I wouldn't want to mention more about it

at least i do well now

who cares about kindergarden...

and down this picture is my cousin bro (NICK)

real naughty little boy

talks like a grown-up but act like a little brat

hahaha...

but still...he looks real good today

loves his hair

his mom purposely bring him to hair salon to do his hair

very cool!!! :)

and he dance awesome

LAstly,

HAPPY GRADUATION DAY FOR YOU LITTLE NICK

AND today

I also watch dvd with my dad at home

ORPHAN

"great movie"

This girl acted very very well

love the story lines

very scary but GOOD

OH YA!!

today is also

a trick or treat day

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE

describe LOVE???

2009-10-28T09:01:00.000-07:00

What was it like when a person hurt too much
he or she got so afraid to be hurt again?
Is a fear that u cannot see but is strong enough to held you back to the world of misery....

Does HOLDING ON make someone stronger or LETTING GO?

You fell many times
yet you just can't get enough

What is love?
Why it can make someone so blind to see?
Love is not stupid...
but I remember once I did called someone stupid because of love
doing something which is unacceptable....
but when this happens to me
I finally understand

Yes...
is broken into pieces when u knew the things u ever wanted
could never be fulfil
yet we'll still continue holding it on close to your heart
and thats the path that we'll be walking through
Is that called LOVE ?

I am afraid to walk this path
But
sometimes
is extremely hard to control this feeling
i try to hide
but how??
when this feeling is pulling me back

Time?

Time never heals
time never cure
not for me
time is just a reason for me to live on with the pain i held on to
is just an excuse for people to say it is a healer

WORDS sometimes can't describe how people feel
Not even your TEARS can make people understand how you deeply feel inside
not till you experience it yourself.................................

TOday is MY First timE ever!!!

2009-10-27T07:04:00.000-07:00

OK..

who is this?????

and what is she doing here????

OMG!!!!

IS....

LIM JIA HUI

WHAT IS SHE DOING WITH MY PHONE???

GOD..

She is taking picture

haha..

swt swt =="

where was her?

in ROMP Fitting room

and i was just next door trying out my clothes as well

but i didn't take any picture

only her..

DUi...

she is still taking picture

do u think she is yeng with this baju??haha....

comment please!! cos she really wants to know..

hahaha XD XD XD

Actually today is my first time taking train with Jia hui

she teach me how to take train cos i dunno how and i never try it before

lame betul me!!

from klang, teluk pulai to KL and subang JAya

so we went to MID VALLEY..

IN mid-valley we ate JAPANESE FOOD
haha..

yay..

then...

she went to do something very incredible after lunch

but i'm not gonna mention here :)hehe

secret!

After that

we go buy buy baju

can't find any clothes that we want in mid valley

so when we sit another train

we went subang parade

go see more clothes

yup

we did get something

then..

go get some drinks

go back and take another train

the train got abit of delay

but still good, can still reach klang by 7.30pm.. XD

ANYway,

I had a great day

though is quite tiring

but i enjoy shopping with you

thanks alot jiahui

we should hang out more XD

but remember to save money first

haha

next time we go sungei wang and times square k!!

more clothes!!!!!

can buy until u really broke man

hahaha

LAStly,

HOpe U feel better

and

no matter what happen

you will still have your friends around you

and

I will always be there for YOU, whenever u need me as well

HUGS HUGS

and

LOTS OF LOVE :)

AND

LIM JIA HUI

YOU ARE SUPER DUPER HANDSOME AND THIN!!!!!!!

XOXOXO

haha

hope it will makes you smile

but honestly

u r quite good looking anyway

BIRTHDAY SOOKIE WITH BACON

2009-10-22T09:26:00.000-07:00

P/S: READ SLOWLY AND STEADY

MY DEAREST SOOKIE

OH NO...

I MEAN

MY DEAREST SOOK ANN ANN

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY!!!

IS MY GREATEST HONOURED TO HAVE YOU AS MY GOOD FRIEND

hehehe~~~~

i know i abit kUA cheong ad..

but nevermind let me continue 1st

HERE

I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE MY APOLOGIZE FOR WISHING YOU SO LATE

I KNOW

WHAT A HORRIBLE FRIEND YOU HAVE

BUT

DON'T WORRY

I VERY SENG MOK WANT

I WILL BELANJA YOU EAT BACON ROLL

AT BBQ PLAZA

5 BIG PLATE OF BACON ROLL!!!

ENOUGH???

IS OK

IF IS NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU

CAUSE

YOU CAN ORDER SOME MORE

BUT

THE EXTRA ONE YOU PAY YOURSELF

hahahaha

AND ONE MORE CONDITION

WE ALSO SHARE THIS 5 BIG PLATE OF BACON ROLL

WHICH MEANS

I EAT 4 PLATE OF BACON ROLL AND YOU EAT 1 PLATE OF BACON ROLL

HAHAHAHAHAHA~~~~~

I'M SUCH A GOOD JOKER!!!

XD XD XD

Reflection of all

2009-10-21T23:08:00.000-07:00

Someone is leaving again

Someone that I hated so much
Someone that once makes my life so dejected
Someone that I wish that she could just leave and never return

BUT
This someone......
Makes me feel so bad today.....

Because
She taught me how to be better this time
She helped me when I needed it the most
She showed me when I'm wrong

She........
I have no words to describe her anymore

Thoughout this year
Mirrors and mirrors kept appearing in front of me
Reflecting all those dreadful behaviour act thoughts judgement that I had made
Though it appears slowly

Yet

I can feel how horrifying these apppearence could be

The tears in my heart is kept to be rub away
with much force on it
cause is not just only tears
is more than just that

I understand and confessed

I'm not good
Not good as a person
Not good at all

In fact
I'm bad
SO bad

My feeling is alerting me
My thoughts is changing me
My experience is teaching me
My dream is reflecting me

Is too real

But
There is one most SIGNIFICANT taught
That haunted me the most

That sounds this way

"The one that I tend to love the most,
Is the one that Hurt me the most,
But..
The one that I hated the most,
Is the ONE that Inspire my life the most"

And I Believe
Time is not the healer of everything
The One that live within You is the healer of itself
Cause sometimes there are just things that the time cannot erase~~~

Tell me if I'm right???

when this feeling

2009-10-15T02:21:00.000-07:00

When this feeling step over

I know

I'm on the way to recover

I know

I'm feeling better

I know

I'm on the way up there

With all these feeling

I promise..

I will continue my journey

and NO more looking back

I think this picture is really cute

hehe.... :)

"JUst so YOu Know"

2009-10-11T11:10:00.000-07:00

I shouldn't love you

but I want to

I just can't turn away

I shouldn't see you

but I can't move

I can't look away

I shouldn't love you

but I want to

I just can't turn away

I shouldn't see you

but I can't move

I can't look away

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not'

Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

[Chorus:]

Just so you know

This feeling's taking control of me

And I can't help it

I won't sit around,

I can't let him win now

Thought you should know

I've tried my best to let go of you

But I don't want to

I just gotta say it all

Before I go

Just so you know

It's getting hard to be around you

There's so much I can't say

Do you want me to hide the feelings

And look the other way

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not

'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

[Chorus]

This emptiness is killing me

And I'm wondering why I've waited so long

Looking back I realize

It was always there

just never spoken

I'm waiting here

been waiting here

[Chorus]

p/s : last and never once more

BegiNNinG

2009-10-11T07:59:00.000-07:00

When YesteRdaY Past

I thiNk and ThiNK,

I wonder and wonder,

When i first stEp into the caR,

I knEw somethiNg is not right

I caN Sense it

I doubt as weLL

aNd RealizeS

hOw awFuL it wouLd be

I'm scArE

wheN I Know the truth

I'm stunt

wheN I Know It doesn't beloNg to Me aNY LongeR

I'm shattering

when the time it concluded

EverytHing chaNge

bUt The onLy thAt doesn't change

Is ME

hOWever

it wiLL Never happEn Once More

cause thiS tiMe

I wILL Change

Nevertheless

I coMpleted evErytHing that I desire to Do

I toLd Her the thIngs that i wIsh to Say

NOw...

Is tiMe for A frEsh StaRt

Is A sTart of A neW mE :)

ThiS is hOW it lOOk likE

2009-10-08T02:30:00.000-07:00

FOOLisH me........

WHy did I wEnt anD vIew it?

thE paIn

thE sorEneSS

the HeartbreakINg

It BLoomS up AgaIn

I GraB mY Heart sO tight preventing it frOm FalliNG aPart

Yet It losses balance and slips Off

I'm SpeechleSS

IS suppose to be a great daY toDay

Since I weNt anD vieW it

It RuiN EverYtHinG

Is Like PeeLing off My SkiN agAin

With All the bruiseS OveR

CaLLIng beggiNg CryiNg

PLEASE StOp

I caN't Take it AnymOre

PLease LEAve Me aLone

I surrEnDer

I kNeeL dOwn Upon U

With All these tEars

The PAin IS JUst too MUcH......

ThE daY Of 04"10"2009

2009-10-07T01:59:00.000-07:00

On THis DaY

In THis PictuRE

IT makeS me reAlize hOw MUch I beeN hiDing

hOw HarD My heArt beatSS
hOw haRd i trY to Be strOng and hAng On
hOw hArd I SuppresseD
hOW iT bloCKed My MinD awaY
hOw I losses aLL my coNsciousness

Till that
I see it Better wiTH my oWn eyeS
It Hurts me TiLL I waNt it to eNd tHis time
Is too mucH
Is too REaL
Is liKe pulliNg awaY my scaR
I caN't Hold bacK nO more
Cause My thoughts are ChokiNg On YoU

I heLd my Heart stroNg enough
To prevent it froM breAking intO pieces
StiLL
I'm JusT NOt tough
to carrY on
My tears came by
these tears are the words my heart uses to explain
when my fake smile
can't cover up my pain

reseaRcH papEr Day AgaiN :(

2009-10-06T22:42:00.000-07:00

StayiNg baCk iN collegE

foR aLMost 2-3 weeks

DoiNg my EnglisH assigment

Is About PlastiC surgEry but NOw i neeD to cHAnge it intO coSmetic surgerY..

DUi....

AnotheR extRA wOrK to do

Been struggling alot with mY courSe mates to do ouR Best to Prepare this researcH..

YAr....

though is only a reseach paper but there is alot to be done

CauSe My teacher is "HigHLy HighLY stricT"

She expecT everYthiNg to be PErFecT

No spelling No grammar No language MISTAKE

Must have the FLow and Bla BLa bLi Bla.......

ANd this reseacH paper coNtain ALot of mArks for me to pass

SO is very very very IMPORTANT!!!

But anyway, we completed our 1st draft and we JUst handed to HER

HopefuLLy thIS time we can do better than the previous one

haha

two same laPtops!!

Me and VysHu got the Exact saMe LaptopS..hehe

Been sitting infront of the laptops for hours to do our reseacH

Can u IdenTiFy whiCh is Mine???

the LEtf one or the right one??

OptimisTic

2009-10-06T07:30:00.000-07:00

wheN i try To be optimistiC

pretend to be myself in the way that I used to be

And I distracT myself from all the memories

maYbe i wiLL bUry aLL the Pain awaY

SOmetiMEs DruGS Are nOt the maiN KEy of aLL these miserY

Perhaps tHis is whaT i thiNk now

Might wILL not know what i caN thiNk off for the next Minutes

HoweVer foR Now, I juSt want to staY awaY from aLL the Memories

I need to recOver

I will make myself as bUsy as I couLd

Is painfuL though......

But if I don't do it

I'm killing mYself insidE so miserably

caUSe deeP Inside I'm stiLL holdinG on

But nOW my heart is telliNg me to Give Up

I beLIeve that

"giviNG uP doesn't meaN you're weaK,

sometimes it means that YOu are strong enough to Let go"

Hopelessness Helplessness Worthlessness

2009-10-05T00:44:00.000-07:00

YesTerDAy..
I realize
fOr the Past 3 mOnths

My woUnd seeM Never HeaL at all
I thOughT i WerE
BuT ActuaLLy In the OtheR way roUnd
I Just continUe supressinG iT so baDLy
collEctiNg bits by bits of the paiN
suddeNly whEn it rIp Off
the sOreness is crushiNg me Back to the WorLd of misEry aGain

In tHe saMe waY
I keeP PulliNg mY scaR TiLL iT getS biggeR and biggeR
finaLLy..
i fiNd iT so DiFFicULt to meNd IT bAck toGeTher

For This ReaSOn
The plaN tO looK Back fOr mY druGS is the 1st solutiOn thAt i cAN think off
Is thE onlY way for me to seize of aLL theSe
Like I onCe Try
It damaGe me poweRfuLLy
aNd I get addictEd to certaIn exteNt tHaT i wiShes tO try the othErs
BuT I faiLed to oBtain it tHis tiMe
And no where to be found

sOmeHow I'M jusT worRied tHat I will kePt mYsELf clingiNg It thIS waY
As
the memOrIes stiLL LingeriNg iNsidE oF me
everY pIcture is getting cLearer aNd clOser to Me
and It woN't sTop leaviNg Me
Helplessly
cryIng at a LengHt of timE
WiThoUt A siNgle vOicE cAn be HearD
TryiNg so hard not To be knOwn

WHAt is aLL theSe?
WhAt haVE i become?
pArt of me had gonE the other part is...........................................................

qUizzz XXXXXXXX

2009-10-02T08:15:00.001-07:00

haha...

FiNallY
i finish my finAL quiz for my psychO
feel soooo relieve
can breath better now....
hahaha...

Luckily My quiz wasn't that tough, still boleh tahan..
AnywaY,
psy 215 mates gonna plan a farewell party for miss shoba..
hehe..
I'm getting a cake for her A CHOCOLATE cake..
yum yum``
this gonna be interesting..
and Tmr is hoLidaY

and i wonder why my uncle didn't call me
Hmmm...
I think he must be fed up alreadY
cos i every week also give excusses tht i can't come
but next week i think i might have to go
or i scare things will get worst

quiz quiz and quiz

2009-10-01T07:24:00.000-07:00

EveRy week alSo got quiz..

CraZZZZZZZY ONE!!!!

I don't feel like studyinG

I'm bored alreadY

BAnyaK the LAzy larrrrrrr

l feel like sleepinG now

haizzz...

OK!

i'm noT gonna write alot today

Going To study Now!!!

~~GAmbate Gambate~~

WaiTinG fOr thE rEply

2009-09-30T07:44:00.000-07:00

I wait

and wait

and wait

When r u going to reply me?

My Patient can't take control anymoRe

Don't message me if u don't think u gonna reply mE please

Do u thiNK thIS is A gaME??

Don't PlaY arounD with all this pLease

I'm not like the Other GirLs that U r flirtinG wiTh

AnD..

I dream of u when i was taking a nap just now

i Saw your reply asking me what time i will be free this weekend

but too bad it was just a dream...

the fact is...

u didn't reply me at all

I check my phone every minute

What a great dissapointment anD yet there is still no message from YOU

PLease don't message me if u don't want to reply me!

EveRytHiNg hAPPens For a rEason```

2009-09-29T08:38:00.000-07:00

I'm already very depressed this few days...

NOw

I felt worst thAn before...

MY FAVOURITE PSYCHOLOGY TEACHER IS LEAVING IN TWO WEEKS TIMES

she is going to SEGI

DAMMNNNNN!!!!

WHY WHY WHY?????? I ask her this just now in her office..

she smile and replied "I got a better offered there but u wil be fine, u will get a different lecturer to teach from HUC" Don't worry Precillia u will do fine here. I know u can"..

haizzzzzzzzz.............

actually I feel like telling her

"U never no how sad i am when u said that and I know I'm not fine at all"

However, I REspect your decision

And I shall Like to dedicate tHis

MEssaGE SpEciallY fOr Miss SHoba:

I start loving psychology because the way u taught us

I feel good with you because

your teaching makes me see

the whole perspective better

and I enjoyed very much for each lesson u teach

the way u convey the meaning with a clear explainations

the way u apply the terms to our everyday life and make it so interesting that you caught my attention for continuous loving this subject

AS a role model, u inspire me

u sparked the creativity of psychology in my life

tO dream and to woRk and to Reach

u are incredibly nice caring teacher

NO word so can truly tell how great you are

But as a teacher, you are numbEr ONE!! :)~~~~

SomeHow,

I still feel really upsad

I don't know what else to say to make myself feel any better..

I started to see things in the other way round now..

maybe the pain in my heart is just too real..

and is too much that time cannot erase :(

QuoteSSS```

2009-09-27T09:24:00.000-07:00

iS my dad's B'day toDay but we didn't do anYthiNG mucH to celebrate iT..

Just A normaL dinneR with My faMily memBer$

And...

My dAd quote aboUt his birthday

" everydaY is yOur b'day, we Can go to anY gooD restauraNt and Have all tHe Delicious fooDs U want But the moSt impoRtant thing is yOur HEalth FaMily and MONEY (of coursE) and I'm NOT fancy abOut anY B'daY celebratioN aNd is just A worthLessneSS eveNt to Me"

haha swt =="..

mayBe he's right.....

what's the poiNt FOR HIM??

I feel sorrY for him I understand what he is trying to say

if my mom is here now then i think she will have done something about it..

something special for his b'day cos i knOw he will be happier..

3 of us, havinG a warm family dinner on this special daY....

But anyway...

I will not want to expect something that will never happen anymore..

Is not gonna change anythinG

aNd my qUote for todaY is.......

"JUst move on

aNd Leave the pASt, LeT the New onE BeGinS

and make it worth to be remember in the futUre

LaStly, A VerY HAPPY BiRthdAy to my beloVed FatHEr"

Me and MoMmy wiLL always Love YOu~~

WhEre Got gHost???????

2009-09-26T09:13:00.000-07:00

I just Watch this movie with TERESSA At aeon...

3 different story with 3 different moral values in every story..

Is quite scary for me..

I scream a little at the cinema which gave teressa a shocked..

haha..

she was quite relaxing watching that movie at 1st but after i scream she was like "shocked"..

haha..

poor thing..

and that show is quite funny xD..

BUt anyway..

i found out something about myself today

I change alot..

really alot...

and understand certain thing better...

haha..

u guys surely don't get it what i understand and at which part i change

but is only me will KNOW.. :)

tHAt teressa said i change alot physically

haha..swt la her!!

anyway, i'm happy that she teman me go watch this show todaY..

I last minute ask her go out..haha..

2 hours before the show start i ask her go out and about 20 minutes before the show start we buy the ticket..haha

swt for both of us =="..

after that we went and eat at KIM GARY..

we both ordered the same dish which got UNAGI this time!!hehe..

Btw, i suppose to go my uncle place(KL) today but i gave some excusses that i couldn't go...

i feel bad actually..

but i really dun want to go..

I don't have the mood to go :( :(

buT ANYhow i enjoy my day todaY :)

I dOn't beLieve YoU-- ---PinK

2009-09-25T11:27:00.000-07:00

i LOVE thIS sonG alot

which is Now playing in my "mixpod"

The Music is wOnderfuL

The lyricS AttracTeD Me~~

SomeHow i feeL saD wheN i liSteN to this song as i go thru the lyrics

so sad :(

``BuT whY itZit So?``

I been hearIng it for many timEs till I actually sinG it alonG

and nevEr get boREd

FinaLLLLL DEstiNatiOn At 1UtamA!!

2009-09-25T08:54:00.000-07:00

HAng out with sookie at 1 utama on tUesdaY

we go watch FinaL destination 3D and is only two of us went and watch!! SWT=="..

cAUse the rest are busy, yue wei ad watch the shoW and joyen is afraid to watch it and weijing is at China..haiz.. sad betul!!

everyone are SO not available..

aNd abOUt that show it wasn't that scARY or that good..

and it last around one and half hour!! stupid LAr.. so fast jiU fInish Liao..

and all die in the end..

aFter finisH watching we went shop shop for baju..

Finally, we went and eat japanese food( which i don't remember what's the name of that restaurant)

aNd i'm not happy about it at 1st cos they GOT NO UNAGI!!!

whaT thE*%$#%#&!!!!!!!!

HOW can A janpanese restaurant doesn't have UNAGI which is my favourite eelssssss!!! AhdUi arrrrr...

I was so dissapointed when the waiteress told me they got no UNagi..

then I straight ask sookie to go to a different jap restaurant to eat which got unagi ONE but she said "DUN LikE thaT la" cos the waiteress already served our drinks !! sad niaaaaaa...

In the end we just eat there..

but anyway i ordered other kind of food which taste not bad as well...

and we ordered BACON tOO..hehe!! our favourite dishes!!

after dInneR we went home loooo...

And I really wanted to watch the singaporean movie !!

haizzz... but i cannot find any teman yet...

ANywaY, that's my day In 1U~~

And sookie, I hoPe We can hang out mORe ofteNN cos I eNjoy going out with YOU!!!

hehe~~~

PaiNNN>>>>>

2009-09-20T23:15:00.000-07:00

arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..........
Is so pain!!!
very very pain..
maybe 1 pill is not enough i need another one..
omg...
i need help...
please stop the pain..
i feel like dying now......
oh..
i forgot to mention
is period pain actually~

YuP.. I'm readY to bloGGGGG!!

2009-09-20T08:49:00.000-07:00

After so Long i didN't bloG
I really don't know what i shoUld wRite ....
A LOT of thinGs happen
I doN't knOw hoW to start..
and some are really private..haha
so i'm not gonna write it now 1st

ANyway..
I'm having my psycho mid-term this friday..
God!!!
is alot to study...
memorize memorize and memorize..
BUt i'm noT gonna think that for now..
haha..
This tuesday I'm going to sunway Piramid watcH movie with sook ann them
she might be BringiNg a Guy Friend..
I should bRing minE too.
But is A GirL
haha..
aNyoNe waNts to JoiN????
U r moSt weLcome..
haha..
Thats all for toDAY!!